Hello Friends and Family! Time for another life update. Hope you aren’t sick of them yet!
Last week Wednesday we celebrated a team member’s birthday by taking a ferry boat tour up the Bosporus into the Black Sea. The day was absolutely beautiful. It was actually cool weather and we enjoyed the relief it brought. We spent hours cruising along the borders of the city seeing all of the ancient and beautiful architecture that has been here for ages. My favorite part was seeing the smaller villages on the outskirts of such an immense city. The business and crowdedness hadn’t seemed taint the peace and sense of community there. I wonder if its inhabitants know what a special place they live in. At the last stop we got off and hiked a mountain to where the remains of a castle dwelled. It was designed to be a protective post at the entrance of the Bosporus all the way back to the times of Daniel. It is so unique to experience the ancient history that captivates this area. We concluded our day by having a gorgeous meal overlooking the sea. I cherish the adventure, peace, and community of that trip.
After such a lovely day, I had the unfortunate experience of getting sick in a foreign country for the first time. I had the classic fever, stuffy nose, inflamed throat, and plugged up ears. It was quite miserable and left me bedridden for a couple days. Without my dear mother to take care of me, my team here stepped in by helping me get antibiotics and making me some delicious soup. Then I was forced to make myself rest. Rest is somewhat of a foreign concept to me and honestly is hard to obtain when one of your roommates is a three year old boy bursting with what seems like endless energy. Let’s just say that this time of rest was extremely difficult for me. I wanted to be fine so I could continue the work we are committed to. I didn’t want to be a bother to anyone or have them go out of their way to take care of me. Then I realized how incredibly foolish this attitude is.
God revealed to me that I spend way too much time trying to pour out love to others, but won’t actually allow people to truly pour that love into me. By feeling guilty to receive from my brothers and sisters in Christ, I am denying them the gift of serving and am relying on myself to somehow sustain my level of love to give others. The truth is if I am not filled with the Spirit of God, the love I try and give to others isn’t anything compared to what it could be when it is done from the Spirit flowing through me. I need to allow myself to be cared for and refreshed in order to care for and refresh others.
This became particularly evident when a Y-team from the States spent some time in prayer for us. Their team expressed such a heart to pray over us so that we could be renewed with the Spirit in our ministry. As we were getting acquainted, I was feeling like a zombie- completely distracted and drained by my sickness. I couldn’t breathe through my nose. I couldn’t hear from my ears. I could barely swallow. Feeling rather shy when asked, I sat in the middle of the circle and allowed these beautiful people to lay their hands on me. Beyond just the asking for healing of my physical needs they addressed my spiritual needs. One of the women felt particularly strongly that God was asking me to be an interceder for the people. A totally new concept to me, yet it completely made sense with the overall call God has placed on my life and the gifts he has given me with understanding the hearts and needs of people. I honestly was filled with the spirit and felt the power of healing through this team’s prayers.
I also was encouraged that as followers of Christ, we have been given an inheritance of courage and authority which actually brings about change both in this realm and the spiritual realm. I have always subconsciously held the idea that my presence and my prayers are ultimately of little significance. This lie causes me to tend to be timid in my approach to spiritual matters. This team showed me that we have not been given a spirit of timidity or fear, but a spirit of immense courage in Christ. Its time I started living into that truth. Why limit what God can do through me by doubting my significance. To God, I am significant enough to die for. In turn I get the absolute privilege to be a vessel of his all-powerful love. How beautiful is that!
Speaking of beauty, I have been reading a book that has inspired me to go on a relentless pursuit. The pursuit of experiencing beauty in God, beauty in His creation, and beauty in us. Yes there is still beauty left in us to marvel at! This book is called Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul by John and Stasi Eldredge (author of Wild at Heart). These authors peel back the lies accredited to being female and replace them with the truths of our essence as women. When God created Eve, she was something to marvel at. Eve wasn’t an afterthought of creation. She was absolutely essential for creation to be complete and for God’s image to fully be shown. The authors of Captivating write:
“Eve is created because things were not right without her. Something was not good. “It is not good for man to be alone” (Gen. 2:18). This just staggers us. Think of it. The world is young and completely unstained. Adam is yet in his innocence and full of glory. He walks with God. Nothing stands between them. They share something none of us has ever known, only longed for: an unbroken friendship, untouched by sin. Yet something is not good? Something is missing? What could it possibly be? Eve. Woman. Femininity. Wow. Talk about Significance.”
We too as women have the role and characteristics of God that the world so desperately needs. Being in this culture where women are considered cursed because of what Eve did in the garden, I see the desperate need of these women to understand their own significance.
One of the deepest desires of the female is to be found beautiful and to unveil beauty. This is true across every age or cultural boundary because it is how we were created to be. Beauty is in our design and should be cultivated. Sadly, the world has perverted this desire of beauty to cheapen women painting them as either vain or insecure. Full of themselves or worthless. Beauty, which was part of the original design, became something that brought shame to women instead of inspiration and life to all. Instead of exemplifying God’s beauty, it now is used to degrade the worth of his creation.
When I am talking about this beauty, I am not speaking of it in superficial or shallow means. I am talking about the all consuming beauty that absolutely captivates the attention, affection, and heart of our God. It is the mind, body, and soul kind of beauty. It is the beauty that resonates the true life of our savior, both in males and females.
God has revealed to me the importance of pursuing and unveiling this sort of beauty especially in the lives of the women we are working with. Many would not immediately think of this as something to be addressed, but I believe that it is vital in the healing and restoration of women who have experienced trafficking, addictions, and abuses of various kinds. Honestly, it is essential in the life of all women.
Somewhere along the line we have been deceived to look at ourselves as failures, many times as the result of our experiences or broken relationships. Never pretty enough. Never smart enough. Never thin enough. Never recognized enough. We continually perceive ourselves as not being enough and therefore loose what makes us truly unique and influential. If we embraced our beauty instead of denying it exists or hiding it because of the pain we have experienced, just image how the world would transform. We would not only transform ourselves but also inspire others in the unveiling of beauty. That is what these women desperately need after having to live a life full of darkness, dirt, and shame. After having their value so degraded by sexual abuse and violence. Who are we to withhold beauty from their healing process? Who are we to hide our beauty from them? Who are we to not help them recognize beauty in themselves?
God created us all for beauty and sees us as his masterpiece. Psalm 45:11 says “The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord.” The Lord is enthralled by our beauty. Just as I feel enthralled by the beauty of the sea, the smell of a lily, the innocent smile of a child, or the look of a bride on her wedding day, God is enthralled by me. He is in absolute awe of your beauty. Don’t deny it or hide it any longer! God desperately wants to rejoice in you and the world desperately needs to see your beauty. How else will it see the beauty of its creator?
Final things I would like to say:
My dear friends, Evan and Lia, got married on Friday! Congratulations you two! I pray such blessings over your marriage. I know that it honors God in such beautiful ways! Can’t wait to celebrate with you when I return home! Have fun on the honeymoon.
Love and miss you all! I can't believe I only have 35 more days here.
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